Archive for December, 2007

My Mini Reviews.

Tuesday, December 4th, 2007

Copying Eyeris’s style of not a review review, but not quite. My review’s format is going to be more like “spit everything out from my head right at the moment I’m typing it” sort. Short and sweet posts are good right? Yes, and so are updates.

Stardust
I have read the book and I kinda liked it. I have watched the movie and I liked it even MORE than the book! Movie was not exactly like the book, but it is so damn adorable you’ll leave the theatre (only after the movie of course) with a goofy smile on your face and a warm feeling in your tummy. The cast was right, the scenes were right, the lines were right, the storytelling was right. The lead guy was damn lovable in a puppy-eyed sort of way. I did feel that somebody a bit more ethereal than Claire Danes should take her role, but I can’t think of any names. Definitely NOT Kirsten Dunst, though. And Cate Blanchett’s too old. Somebody younger. Easily one of my favourite movie of the year (tied top spot with 300!). It didn’t try too hard to tell you a story, it just TOLD you the story - something which a lot of movies these days try too hard to do but just can’t seem to get it right. Stardust got it just right.

Hitman
Lead character looks cool until he starts to speak. The way he lifelessly stares into the screen, right at me, as he swiftly disembowels yet another victim just makes me want to take him home and…. I can’t freaking believe he was that floppy wristed disjointed hipped gay bad guy from Die Hard 4.0. Until he opens his yap, then try as hard as I can I just could NOT forget that he IS that floppy wristed disjointed hipped gay bad guy from Die Hard 4.0, which totally loses that bad-boy-sex-appeal. The girl is kind of goth hot but is totally pointless and is only there to spice it up with some sex, which we can see NONE of. Nobody can act for shit.The script murders IQ. The plot was… WHAT PLOT? Save money, play the damn game. Don’t bother watching it.

I’m not even going to catch Beowulf - because watching fake Angelina Jolie on screen just doesn’t it do it for me. But I might try to catch the Enchanted - because somebody told me that *I* would like it. Apparently this somebody reads my blog and KNOW that I’m an ANGRY, BITTER baby eating machine and YET this person thinks I might like it. If he is wrong, his first newborn I shall consume. You know who you are, so be afraid, because I KNOW where you live. Muahahahahaha!

Reviews | 12 Comments