Archive for the 'Silly Stunts' Category
Friday, November 23rd, 2007
Remember this?
Milo replied! But the response was damn boring lah… standard issue template. Called me “sir” some more. So disappointing.
Anyway, because sharing is caring, here it is, just for you!
Dear Sirs,
Thank you for contacting MILO website. There is no secret………Just prepare MILO according to the instructions on our label to get that perfect drink. Should you have further clarifications, please call our Free phone 1800-88-3433 during office hours and our representative will be happy to assist you.
Regards.
Nestlé Consumer Services
On another note: WERE YOU STUCK IN THAT STUPID JAM TODAY? STUPID STUPID STUPID.
And another: OI. WHY YOU CALL ME CHUBBY!
Silly Stunts |
Friday, November 9th, 2007
“Hi there, I have been wondering for ages, how to recreate the milo drink to taste exactly like the ones which are distributed from the milo truck. This has been bugging me and all my friends since childhood. I would appreicate it very much if you could share the recipe, which I hope is not an industry secret. Please, please, please. Thanks! :)”
I hope they reply.
Silly Stunts |
Tuesday, August 15th, 2006
A strange packet from the You Arse of Aye arrived one day.
A rustling was heard.
Where was it coming from?
It was coming from the packet!
Goodness gracious! There were Gummies in the packet!
They were trapped in that big bad plastic packet!
Undeterred, they were desperately clawing at the plastic walls with their gummy paws and chewing it with their gummy mouth.
Their persistence was rewarded with FREEEDOM!
In jubilation, they celebrated late into the night with gummy dancing and gummy music.
Witnessed by the stars and the moon.
One curious gummy however, strayed and played a little too far from the rest of his pack.
Got itself quite lost it did.
Oh no! What was a gummy to do?
It climbed atop of the highest peak to get a better view.
It explored the inner sanctums of a cave.
But the more it looked, the more lost it got.
Sensing the hopelessness of its situation, it decided to just chill in a well. It was damp. It was cool. It fell asleep.
Unbeknownst to it, nature was forming a sinister plot.
While the gummy fell asleep in the well, the tide came rushing in.
It came in hard and flooded the well.
The poor gummy was forced to swim, if it wanted to survive.
But how long could he keep doggy gummy paddling?
It was about to give up when suddenly…..
….. a voice boomed from far away.
“Let go”
“This water is holy. It is pure. It will cleanse you. It will make you forget”
“You shall be reborn”
Enlightened, it smiled and let go.
And became one with everything.
The End.
Notes:
1. This was a failed experiment to infuse gummy bears with vodka. Can you imagine the possibilities of vodka infused gummies? I would earn MILLIONSSSS! Buy a sports car! Own a harem of virile boys! A holiday villa in Spain! A kennel of award winning pedigree dogs! From past experiences, gummy bears DO soak up water and expand to about 5 times its original size, which is why I thought it would work with vodka too. And in case you’re still wondering if it did or not - it didn’t.
2. I didn’t taste the end product. The concoction did smell like Vodka OJ. But it also smelt like melted plastic. I didn’t have enough balls to want to risk 5 years of my life or growing an extra arm out of my face by tasting it.
3. Several gummy bears HAVE been harmed during the production of this short story. Most of them ended up in a darker, deeper, damper cavity of sorts. But fear not gummy bear lovers, for they didn’t suffer….. much. Yum.
4. Argh. The camera’s condemned to high hell. Macro function is shot. In fact, even the focusing for normal portrait shots is whacked. Flash is wonky too. Time to get a new camera. A handphone. A watch. A car….. and a sugar daddy to pay for ‘em all. Sigh.
4. The Gummy Bears were proudly sponsored by Eyeris! You’re the best! Muaks!
Silly Stunts |
Friday, March 3rd, 2006
Suan inspires me to do most ridiculous shit to myself…. which is a good thing for this site, I guess. Besides, there are just too many freaking “TAKE ME SERIOUSLY NOW OR I KILL YOUR DOG” blogs with their endless political, social and personal rants already, I mean, come ON!!
So, as a big FUCK YOU I DON’T CARE ABOUT YOUR WHINGINGS AND BITCHINGS ANYMORE SO SHUTTHEFUCKUP ALREADY AND GET A REAL JOB SUCKERS, here are a bunch of pictures dedicated to MEMEME, in various outrageous outfits and face colours, attempting to emulate the Harajuku street look on a ZERO budget.
Besides, it’s not how fast you can empty your pockets for a piece of crazy clothing item. It’s about the freedom of interpretation and expression! It’s about the attitude and the blank vacuous expressions! It’s about the shameless camwhoring!
Let’s go go go!
Can you see the pink star on my right eye? It was meant to be a tribute to JEM AND THE HOLOGRAMS, which was my favourite cartoon of ALL TIME EVER! Jem! Truly outrageous! Truly truly truly outrageous!
Rainbow coloured socks make me happy! But ridiculously high-heeled boots should be outlawed because THEY FUCK WITH YOUR KNEES!
Going for the rocker punk chick look, or not.
Wanted to look like Wednesday from the Addam’s Family, but ended up looking more like a goth chipmunk in drag.
No animals were harmed and skinned alive for this shoot. Promise.
Those pompoms on my head belonged to my sis which she used for her kindergarten Sailormoon dance recital. Yeah, I know.
Pikachu! I choose you!
I love pink. Pink makes me happy. The eye shadow is >10 years old. That’s SO Fear Factor.
Lame attempt at Gothic Lolita. Not enough lace and frills to make it Old English. Whatever. I want a black lacy brolly.
Sad attempt at some completely made-up Cosplay character. You know what I need? I need more boobs. Spilling out of the blouse. That’s what I need. And yes. That’s a sword. And it’s retractable. And it’s cool. And very mine. No, you can’t have it, NYEH.
THE END NO MORE!
I used a tripod for this shoot. It was pretty tough doing the whole “looking at nobody” thing, SOBER.
Note to “Real life friends” who know I hardly ever wear skirts: Will you STOP LAUGHING NOW you goddamn freakin’ carcass eating hyenas.
But that was SO FUN!!!! I have SO MUCH JUNK OMFG! Maybe I’ll do it again some other time. BWAHahahhaha! YEAY!
Let’s make this an open meme!!!
If you want to do the the Harajuku do too (haha), all you have to do is take pictures and post them up on your own blogs, then leave a comment and a link at the comment section so we can all go see it together-gether. After all, that’s why you blog right? To give random strangers an avenue to jeer and ridicule at you? No? Okay go away now.
JUST DO IT! I DON’T CARE FFS! IN THE NAME OF ALL THINGS SILLY AND FUN!
And that concludes today’s edition of SILLY STUNTS! Ta!
Silly Stunts |
Monday, February 27th, 2006
I’ve been wanting to make liqueur shake for a while now. In my mind it would be the most delicious cold drink EVER. I would patent the recipe, sit back, and wait for the MILLIONS to rake in. And if that didn’t work out, I would have some fun making it and SOME form of alcoholic beverage to drink in the end, at least.
So, on one typically boring Friday night, and just because I’m a sad pathetic worm who’s terribly single and have no social life whatsover, I managed to con Mr Koi Pervert to take part in this silly experimental project of mine (and to be my guinea pig lah, don’t tell him that ok?). Of course, it’s also a good excuse to drink. Bwahehaheaheha.
So, without further ado.
Introduction
I love vanilla ice-cream. And I love my liqueurs. To mix them both up and create an ice cold alcoholic beverage would be a fantastical idea. Add one good thing with another good thing so that the result would be GREATER than the sum of the good things added together. The Synergy concept should work on EVERYTHING…. right?
Materials & Equipments
-1 shot glass (I used the Ikea one.. which is actually MORE than 1 shot. Yeay!)
-Baileys (milk for adults)
-Kahlua (coffee for alcoholics)
-50% Smirnoff Vodka Blue Label (bleach for your innards)
-Milk (not a really good idea, as we will find out later)
-Blender (to mix the shit with)
-1 tub of Vanilla Ice Cream (yum)
Oh what fun is it to make an alcoholic beverage!
Experimental Procedure
1. One shot of Baileys, Kahlua, & Vodka EACH, separately measured and tasted. Yum.
2. Measure another shot of the above conconction and pour into blender.
3. Measure 1 glass of milk.
4. Pour that stuff into the blender too, yo.
5. 4 big spoonfuls of ice cream chucked into blender, NEVER forget to taste it first, because it’s yum.
6. Blend blend blend.
Don’t forget to taste EVERYTHING.
Observations
1. Foam on top of the drink, like cappucino foam. Probably from the milk and ice-cream.
2. Latte coloured
3. Strong vodka smell and taste
4. Very thin, like milk - not milkshakey enough.
Got milk?
Conclusion
Sigh. Didn’t turn out as FANTABULOUS as I’d envisioned it. Subject to improvement. Looks like my million dollar raking plan will have to be delayed a TAD bit.
At least it was FUN and we HAD our drinks. So it was still SUPER! 
Silly Stunts |
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